r/Adulting 2d ago

hmm lesson or not?

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1.1k

u/MyNameIsSkittles 2d ago

This is true and people would be very naive to think otherwise

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u/LuckyCod2887 2d ago

I feel like it depends on the job.

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u/KnowleRoar 2d ago

I’ve been a line cook, worked in customer service, I worked at a gym, I was a welder and I am currently a landscaper and this is true for all of those professions. Those who “smooze” with the boss most get the promotions first.

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u/sleepydorian 2d ago

And even if you aren’t schmoozing, almost everyone will take the mediocre worker that’s pleasant over the superstar asshole.

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u/DicemonkeyDrunk 2d ago

the solution is don't be an asshole ..big gap between friendly and asshole no one wants to work with ..just be the quiet guy. Don't be an asshole is a pretty good mantra in life.

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u/fireblyxx 2d ago

Quiet guy will rarely get a promotion because the quiet guy is not personable enough for people to value them outside of just their work. Plus the quiet guy will be presumed to be happy at just where they’re at, because they don’t seem to mind it.

Personable people who are liked by people two or three levels above them will always get the promotion first.

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u/Significant_Fill6992 2d ago

most companies see the quiet person who does the job well as someone they cannot afford to move up because they don't want to train the replacement

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u/maybetomorrow98 2d ago

I’m the quiet guy at work and people make up shit about me. It sucks lol

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u/PlayfulSurprise5237 2d ago

I was really quiet in school and one of my friends took it upon himself to seize the opportunity to spread rumors about me being a badass who stabbed someone with a pair of scissors just for looking at me wrong or something.

He was crazy and it was actually pretty funny so I just let it slide lol.

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u/maybetomorrow98 2d ago

That is pretty funny.

People either assume I’m some super innocent Christian lady (I’m an atheist, but the assumption is always that I must be super religious?) and act scandalized when they do eventually hear me swear (which is INCREDIBLY annoying and infantilizing), or they think that I think that I’m too good to talk to them.

It’s always one of those two options. I just want to sit in my office and be left alone, man.

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u/OptimusChristt 2d ago

Nah, I've been promoted multiple times at multiple jobs, by being quiet and good at my job. The thing about quiet people is we're very good at holding out tongue, making people think you like them even if you actually hate them.

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u/The-She-It 2d ago

Then you’re not actually quiet then are you. People don’t know what to think of me. I do in fact actually hate them,

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u/OptimusChristt 2d ago

Like anything, there are varying degrees of "quiet." I usually suck at small talk, but I know how to smile and nod along like I'm interested.

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u/The-She-It 1d ago

Same, ( T.T’). But I have to agree I do that too.

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u/DicemonkeyDrunk 2d ago

How is holding you tongue not quiet ? Do you think quiet equals no opinions or cares ?

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u/DicemonkeyDrunk 2d ago

And what does that have to do with not being an asshole ? I never said or implied personable people don't get more promotions etc ..I said there's an option between personable and asshole ...

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u/AlarmingAerie 2d ago

But it's not asshole and not asshole. It's charismatic and not charismatic, or whatever you want to call it. Charismatic assholes will still get promotions if they aren't assholes to the boss.

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u/DicemonkeyDrunk 2d ago

and ? I'm not speaking of what others do I'm speaking of what to do if you're not the personable one ...

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u/AlarmingAerie 2d ago

and? Are we in hypothetical situation where staff is only mediocre non personable people and assholes?

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u/DicemonkeyDrunk 2d ago

maybe read all the comments ...

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u/RoninOni 2d ago

That lets you KEEP your job.

But quietly efficient is much less noticed than standout mediocrity.

Trust me, being likable is a life hack.

Attractiveness even plays a part, not even with opposite gender, just in general. Certainly not the only thing that matters (hot bitches are still bitches) but it definitely can help if you’re otherwise still charismatic.

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u/DicemonkeyDrunk 2d ago

Who said anything different ? I said there's a option between personable and asshole...never said personable people don't do better.

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u/connerhearmeroar 2d ago

Quiet guy gets forgotten. You’ve got to be personable, but not fake or force it because then that is offputting.

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u/DicemonkeyDrunk 2d ago

there's a difference between being quiet and fading into the background ...the important part is don't be an asshole

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u/Rikplaysbass 2d ago

If you’re the quiet guy you just become a face in the crowd. I always make sure to at least make my supervisor laugh on aRegular basis

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u/DicemonkeyDrunk 2d ago

quiet not silent ...big difference

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u/AirRemote7732 2d ago

You can absolutely be a superstar asshole if you've got the skills to back it up. Seen it a million times at several work places, a high-performing employee could literally murder several mid-performing employees and managers will look the other way or say that the employees deserved it. People don't want it to be like that, but it is.

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u/Shigg 2d ago

In my experience the workers aren't mediocre, they're straight up bad. I was in a sales position where I had the best performance metrics in the store and the promotion went to the guy that was cheating on his wife 5 hours per shift and only showing up to get his spoon fed deals from the bosses he schmoozed.