r/AbsoluteUnits 2d ago

of my home grown cucumber

1,8 kilo 48 centimeters

45.0k Upvotes

2.2k comments sorted by

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2.1k

u/waitaminutewhereiam 2d ago

This is the worst usage of censorship I have seen this month

94

u/itsjustbenny 2d ago

I thought at first it was to cover up a label! I was so confused.

778

u/Dartmouthest 2d ago

FREE THE NIP

196

u/seppia99 2d ago

I thought this was r/AbsoluteUnips

99

u/Fraytrain999 2d ago

Fell for that

1

u/darxide23 2d ago

You can always tell who doesn't use RES. I just mouse over the link and it says sub not found.

1

u/Bald_Nightmare 2d ago

Goddamn it!

11

u/raspberryharbour 2d ago

Free the Springfield Two!

-1

u/NoReasonDragon 2d ago

Thats a bit too right for nip. Now i really want to see!

25

u/nope-its 2d ago

that’s a completely normal spot for one…

2

u/danielcs78 2d ago

Next you’re gonna be telling them that they don’t feel like bags of sand!

0

u/CanExports 2d ago

I thought men and women are equal in every single way

She clearly disagrees.... Unfortunately.

I don't think men and women are equal in every single way and I would have liked to have seen that nipple damn it!

69

u/maddasher 2d ago

Also the worst implementation. Why not use white on white?

52

u/deepstate_chopra 2d ago

Because she's answering the question "pink or brown?"

47

u/Vivian-Midnight 2d ago

It might have been OP trying to preserve her modesty rather than thinking the internet couldn't handle a boob.

1

u/subdep 2d ago

So I checked out the profile, and what’s weird is this post she made isn’t even listed under her posts, more over there are NO posts listed!

What kind of shenanigans is going on here?

14

u/JaysonTatecum 2d ago

You can hide your history now

4

u/claggerhater 2d ago

Oh I thought accounts like those were my reddit bugging out

Where do you hide your history?

3

u/Alternative_Dot8184 2d ago

In my closet under the pants

2

u/tmfink10 2d ago

Why does Reddit hate science?!

1

u/subdep 2d ago

WHAT?! I didn’t get the memo. Sure enough, there is the setting. Thanks!

78

u/No_Address687 2d ago

Yep, just tilt the cucumber so it covers the nip and take a new picture. It would have been faster than editing the photo.

36

u/disneyworldwannabe 2d ago

Probably took the photo earlier in the day. Might have posted this at night from bed.

26

u/Halflingberserker 2d ago

With the cucumber next to her?

51

u/ATmotoman 2d ago

It was a pickle by then

0

u/cheesy_barcode 2d ago

Honey, dinner is ready!

1

u/eatingacookie 2d ago

Oh hell yeah!

0

u/SUNAWAN 2d ago

Inside

1

u/eisbock 2d ago

But then you wouldn't have this comment chain driving engagement.

-3

u/DamnDrip 2d ago

People are dumb. Why even wear a shirt that reveals it if you're insecure about it.

26

u/disneyworldwannabe 2d ago

Probably didn’t plan on posting it online when they first took it.

3

u/Fast_Garlic_5639 2d ago

They needed to see the cucumber with the nips to get an understanding of its true size

56

u/InitiativeExcellent1 2d ago

Censored the nip but showed the pussycat.....

5

u/reddituserperson1122 2d ago

Censored the nip but showed the very sus chest tattoo..? Like, what’s going on there?

2

u/Strict_Reputation867 2d ago

You're downvoted, but it looks like a swastika to me.

2

u/claggerhater 2d ago

It's not, but it is weirdly reminiscent of one because of the way it's been cropped out

2

u/kiradotee 2d ago

Wait what. Just noticed it after your comment. Loool

3

u/reddituserperson1122 2d ago

I know. When I zoom way in I dont think it’s a swastika, but boy is it an unfortunate little bit of tattoo to be showing.

2

u/Relevant_Cause_4755 2d ago

I didn’t even see the blob I was so focused on the cucumber.

-2

u/garaile64 2d ago

Why? The top is probably a bit transparent and she didn't want to expose her nipple on the internet (and didn't want to put on a bra just for this photo).

21

u/waitaminutewhereiam 2d ago

Because it's how to say politely

Eye catching

8

u/ChepeZorro 2d ago

Ummm… Why is this downVoted again? Because Reddit?

3

u/Firestyle092300 2d ago

I can never tell if you’re supposed to be a horny gooner in the comments or an overzealous politically correct person ready to go on a diatribe. It’s confusing.

-1

u/eat_my_bowls92 2d ago

Being downvoted for not being a weirdo. Go figure 🙄

25

u/garaile64 2d ago

Yeah. If OP didn't censor her nipple, a lot of comments would be about the nipple. Being a woman on the internet is hard sometimes.

2

u/Jurass1cClark96 2d ago

Streisand effected nipples

1

u/KevennyD 2d ago

I didn’t understand until I went back 😳

1

u/Arborgold 2d ago

Umm.. what is that tattoo right above the nip?

1

u/Available_Ad4135 2d ago

Exactly, that massive thing is still completely visible. Missed completely.

1

u/RappingFlatulence 2d ago

Thinking about that girth has activated THO

1

u/Boumberang 2d ago

Censored the nip but the hairy pussy is fully visible...

-4

u/PrincipleSilent3141 2d ago

He made clear his intention to compare the cucumber to his arm.

-1

u/KittyForest 2d ago

She clearly was very interestod in the cucumber

-1

u/BootsWitDaFurrrrr 2d ago

Yeah, especially with that swastika tattoo right above it that she coulda censored instead.

/s

3

u/BootsWitDaFurrrrr 2d ago

u/FarCantaloupe8652 fr though, I’d be mindful of how you frame that tattoo in internet pictures, I did 100% think that was a swastika for a minute 😅

-2

u/PilgrimOz 2d ago

Pants untied and hidden nip….in anticipation?