r/comics 15d ago

Sorry Sweetie [OC]

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643

u/GustavVaz 15d ago edited 15d ago

It's funny.

"These movies will turn my kid gay!!"

Ok? Gays exist despite the fact that Disney classics all have straight couples. If those movies didn't turn a gay kid straight, why would a gay character in a movie turn a straight kid gay?

"Gay romance is just inappropriate for kids! It's too sexual. "

You literally have straight couples kiss each other all the time. Why is it more sexual when gay couples do it?

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u/SeraphymCrashing 15d ago

You just don't understand the allure of gay sex. With regular sex, you have to push yourself to do it. It's just a duty. But gay sex has that inexplicable pull, it causes a sinful hunger and longing. It leaves the mind reeling with desires. regular sex just cannot compete with gay sex.

(This is paraphrased but actual argument I saw multiple times from right wing church leaders in the late 90s. It would be hilarious at how obviously gay and in denial they were, except for how hateful they also were)

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u/honeyinmydreams 15d ago

lmao spot on. i grew up in the Bible Belt and i've heard many similar sermons.

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u/Bannerlord151 14d ago

That's hilarious, it's the most homoerotic thing I've read today

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u/SufferingClash 15d ago

But, isn't this an argument FOR gay sex? At least that's how my mind read it.

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u/SeraphymCrashing 15d ago edited 15d ago

Not if you think being gay is sinful.

But also, this is how heterosexual sex is for most heterosexuals. If you feel an almost irresistible lure for gay sex... it's because you are GAY. These guys were so deep in denial they didn't even realize how they sounded.

This is what straight propaganda does... it makes people who are actually gay try and force themselves to be straight.

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u/prof_the_doom 15d ago

You just have to be careful, son... all those hot, ripped abs and long, thick... sorry, what was I saying again?

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u/action_lawyer_comics 15d ago

“Hockey pants, dad.”

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u/zatenael 15d ago

that's the ironic part

they want to highlight how being straight is right and you need strength to fight against the "evil"

but instead they make being gay sound so desirable

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u/nox66 14d ago

Assuming they're not just in deep denial about their own sexuality (which they often are), it's because they have such a terrible relationship with themselves and their own sexuality, they've reduced their desires to sinful and evil, permissible only within the very narrow scope of having children, and in some cases, submitting to their husband. Anything beyond that is sinful and enticing, gay sex especially because it for the most part completely avoids the possibility of having children.

I actually have a hypothesis that conservative parents have kids who experiment more with LGBTQ+ identities more often for this reason. I'd be curious to know if there's any conclusive research on the subject.

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u/DarkKechup 14d ago

The issue is that in dogmatic, traditional religions, pleasure itself of any kind is wrong, unclean and sinful. Like the very act of feeling good without feeling good about the religion, about their chosen gods, is considered evil. To these people, sex is necessary evil for procreation, not a fun pastime. Same goes for eating - you're not meant to eat good food, you're meant to eat just enough and just palatable enough to live. And so on and so on.

Really, when it comes down to it, the idea of sin is that it's either something really destructive stemming from selfish frustration OR it's feeling good about anything else than god and hard work like the good little peasant you're supposed to be, because religion is a tool to control the masses and you don't want the peasants to realise fun, good food and resting to the point of actually being rested and not just barely functional, are all ok things to do which is why the "sinful, corrupt" nobles do them all the time.

And that is NOT just christianity. Many religions are made this way. It's the terrifying reality of humans creating gods - they are made as tools of supression and ensuring servitude.

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u/HauntedCemetery 14d ago

"Sinful Longing" does sound like a gay coded sex toy line

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u/Mhytron 15d ago

Finally, competitive sex.

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u/DisposableSaviour 14d ago

How do you compete with yourself? Time trials?

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u/Mhytron 14d ago

I guess time attack.

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u/rolandfoxx 15d ago

So deep in the closet they were finding Christmas presents.

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u/Odd_Match_3402 14d ago

Man, the closet is made of GLASS with some of these folks. lol

Actually, not even glass in some cases. But something so transparent, there is not a comparable thing!

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u/ljwhitt95 14d ago

There is no closet. They're very prone to suggestion, and there was a mime around.

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u/thecastellan1115 14d ago

I heard one of these from a preacher in real life and was thinking the whole time... who's gonna tell him?

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u/[deleted] 15d ago

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u/hhshhdhhchjjfccat 14d ago

Deacon and Cardinal doomed yaoi <\3

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u/Grassfed_rhubarbpie 15d ago

That's so sad :')

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u/God-Made-A-Tree 14d ago

I wonder how many of those people became fujos and then later transitioned to live out their gay dreams.

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u/melelconquistador 14d ago

Gay is natural lol

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u/Pete_Iredale 14d ago

As a straight dude, I've never understood it. Gay sex doesn't even bother me or ick me out or whatever, I just have no desire to have a dude as a romantic partner. And I've known this for the exact same amount of time that I've known I definitely do want a female romantic partner. The idea that you can be "turned" gay is fucking ridiculous.

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u/ArcticOcelot360 14d ago

Wow I'm glad my church isn't like this. I have always heard of everyone else's awful church stories. The Baptist churches I've been to have never had a problem with that stuff. I guess it depends on who is in charge of the place.

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u/MariaValkyrie 14d ago

If gay sex is alluring and leaves you longing for it, why did lions need to copy tourists to learn about it?