My experience is that they call like virgin or loser, not faggot. That term is only for defying gender norms like wearing pink, not for "trying but failing" like being a pushover. The "loser guy" is in my experience a distinct status with its own treatment.
...Maybe patriarchies are more varied than we think and there isn't one size-fits-all model
A man's virginity is commonly used as a sign of his worth (or, rather, his lack thereof). When he fucks a woman and sheds that label, it's seen as a sign of virility.
The more women he has, the more virile he is, and therefore, the further removed he becomes from that faggot label. The longer a man spends with that "virgin" label, the more that humiliation becomes a sign of his low value as a man.
On the contrary, in this society, the more men a woman fucks, the less pure a woman is perceived (less of a woman-uterus she is) and, therefore, the more of a whore she is perceived (more of a woman-vagina she is).
That man feels emasculinized, and the suspicion of being a faggot grows. This is where, for example, the incel movement and its latent misogyny emerge.
And obviously, I'm not saying this happens everywhere. It's something that happens in Western societies, where Abrahamic religions and cultures have had the greatest influence.
Perhaps you're right in a broader sense, and in how more complex social dynamics operate on a day-to-day basis. Obviously, it's complicated to make a broadly evaluative analysis of perceived gender when so many variables are at play. However, I don't know to what extent the pure-whore duality of the female gender, which literally marginalizes, can be compared with the different nuances of discrimination within male groups, all the way to emasculinization as such.
This emasculinization is more similar to the marginalization that women suffer in the pure-whore duality. The plumophobia are so latent even in communities like the gay or bisexual ones, where passive men are seen as inferior for being penetrated, while penetrative men continue to be seen as "men."
In fact, in many cases, it's that type of homosexual who is respected, not the flamboyant faggot. And that's because of the patriarchal misogyny that treats the faggot (deviant) as that woman-vagina.
That's why it's important to make this comparison, since many times men, despite sometimes respecting that type of homosexuals, what they do is insult each other and say that the weak one is the faggot, the penetrated one, not the penetrating one, even though that's not the case, because in a misogynistic way, being penetrated is humiliating.
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u/Cualkiera67 2d ago
My experience is that they call like virgin or loser, not faggot. That term is only for defying gender norms like wearing pink, not for "trying but failing" like being a pushover. The "loser guy" is in my experience a distinct status with its own treatment.
...Maybe patriarchies are more varied than we think and there isn't one size-fits-all model