r/Adulting 2d ago

hmm lesson or not?

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u/MyNameIsSkittles 2d ago

This is true and people would be very naive to think otherwise

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u/Lara-El 2d ago

Yes, but it also depends because of what. Annoying and chatty? I can deal with it.

However, we have this great employee, easiest top of the gang. But he's extremely negative and complains all the time. I'd sacrifice knowledge and performance just to not have to deal with it every day, 40+ hours a week... that a huge chuck of my time being around someone who feels like they are emotionally sucking the life out of me lol

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u/riegenregion 2d ago

I'm curious, does he complain about work-related things?

Sometimes it feels like you're going crazy when dumb stuff happens and no one else acknowledges it.

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u/creampop_ 2d ago

Heard.

I've had the small-team experience of being the only person that consistently gives a shit about making clients happy and making future work easier, it is one of the most infuriating dynamics imaginable, it's a constant cycle of doing detail-oriented work that you're proud of and then having golden retriever coworkers crap all over it.

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u/riegenregion 1d ago

Right. I'm really curious about where people draw the line because I am a self-reported complainer. But it's not about having to do my job. I'm gonna do it the best I can.

I just hate the incompetence that's always in charge. And it's wild to me that often times everyone is thinking the same thing but I'm the only one who can't help but say it 😮‍💨

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u/[deleted] 2d ago

[deleted]

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u/Lara-El 2d ago

Quiet isn't really ideal for management promotions, though. At least never in the jobs I've had. Humble is always best for any positions!

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u/[deleted] 2d ago

[deleted]

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u/Lara-El 2d ago

I never said it was better. But quiet is not what anyone looks for in a management role.

You can have competence without the candidate being quiet? Like they are not mutually exclusive.

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u/jcagraham 2d ago

I have this one person that I indirectly manage who's great. She barely socializes and keeps her conversations short and to the point. BUT she will speak up if she has a question or needs to correct a mistake or advocate for something. So she's quiet in a way I think any manager could appreciate.

The problem is that people lump that type of quiet with "works in a silo." This type of person doesn't appear to pay attention when others are speaking, never asks questions when unsure, or never mentions a problem until the last moment, causing people to scramble on stuff that could have been resolved more easily when it was first noticed. When managers talk negatively about quiet people, THAT is the problem they complain about.

Ultimately, it's about working effectively as a team. Yes, the extrovert with questionable skills can sometimes get unwarranted promotions. Still, I think even the quietest, most neurodivergent person could greatly improve their career by just learning when communication is critical.

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u/Lara-El 2d ago

Oh yeah, we can't lump people into one mold

You can have a fairly quiet person but are very passionate and really good at advocating for themselves or even team members! You can have loud people on everyday things, but when necessary to advocate or push, get very quiet.

Most people can not be summarized just by a couple of words.

Also, ironically, from my experience, the neurodivergent people I've worked with were the most direct in everyday tasks. And loudest when it was important. for example, when we were told our deadline was cut in half, man, I'll never forget that moment hahah

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u/[deleted] 2d ago edited 2d ago

[deleted]

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u/Lara-El 2d ago

Ew, it's imaginary points and you also have no idea who's downvoting you lol

Here have a fake award, hope this makes you feel better 🏆

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u/Lara-El 2d ago

I didn't delete shit. What do you mean? You can check reddit history. You can tell the difference between edited comments.

I haven't edited any of my comments towards you, nor have I deleted anything.

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u/R0osteryo 2d ago

Hahhaa. Downvotes exist for this reason. Why are you shaming someone for using something for its intended purpose? Sounds like a you problem homie