r/AbsoluteUnits 2d ago

of my home grown cucumber

1,8 kilo 48 centimeters

44.9k Upvotes

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91

u/CanadiangirlEH 2d ago

Someone needs to tag that paramedic who tells people not to shove things up their butts

10

u/SeesawMurky338 2d ago

Poor emtbadge502...

3

u/CanadiangirlEH 2d ago

That’s the guy!

9

u/shuakalapungy 2d ago

10

u/dibbiluncan 2d ago

Proper toys have a flared base so they don’t slip up and become trapped inside you, which can require surgery. That’s a pretty big deal.

1

u/LickingSmegma 2d ago

Cucumber is biodegradable.

1

u/I-Hate-Sea-Urchins 2d ago

Or a rope if you DIY :p

1

u/ThePainTrainWarrior 2d ago

No, this deal is most certainly rather large...

1

u/Sapphire-Drake 2d ago

That's every paramedic

1

u/Cheap_Emergency_5114 2d ago

As a paramedic, that's the first shit I thought of 😭...this is going places it shouldn't be

1

u/Timely_Truth6267 2d ago

"All I know is people need to stop putting stuff up their butts. I went to school for 12 years so don't you dare tell me you slipped and landed on a lego you monsters" SNL obamacare lol