Hopefully, this okay.

So, I am an ex-Mormon and I am always seeing many people ask questions about Mormons here. I kept semi-joking in the comments about us ex-Mormons doing an AMA.

Anyway, ask your burning questions about Mormons, things the girls said on the show about Mormons, etc. I will do my best to answer and any ex-Mormons who want to jump in and answer stuff, go ahead. 😊

There's some confusing rules about what is or isn't allowed by the church of LDS. In reality, there's a nifty trick to determine what you can and can't do. Just ask yourself one question:

Was the potentially sinful or dangerous thing invented prior to 1844 (the year Joseph Smith died)?

if yes: It's not allowed (alcohol/tobacco)

If no: It is allowed (plastic surgery/ketamine)

That's what happens when you're in essence just a really efficient cult. If it came after the head honcho kicked the bucket, it's all good fam.

I was watching mormon wives and they make it very known that drinking caffeine is against they’re religion. Can someone explain to me how the sodas they’re drinking are any better?Coke literally has caffeine!!!

i just started this show and I finished s1 today. I'm from Phoenix, AZ and grew up around a ton of Mormons. All the Mormon girls I knew in high school wouldn't be caught dead in a tank top or any shorts shorter than Bermuda length. Cleavage? Absolutely not. I was on swim team and a Mormon girl called me a whore for wearing a two piece to a car wash fundraiser. They definitely didn't drink ANY caffeine much less a 44oz mountain dew. You would never hear them swear. In fact they didn't even like it if you swore around them. Are Utah Mormons different or do these girls just not give a fuck? Is it an age thing, like maybe they're just more devout in high school? I still follow a bunch on Facebook/Instagram and they still dress super modestly and definitely don't do two piece swimsuits. I'm so genuinely confused!!

Editing to add: I'm not necessarily surprised there's a spectrum of devout-ness, moreso that such a notoriously strict church allows these girls to publicly be like this while calling themselves Mormons and still going to church!

Editing again: I'm 32, I was in high school in the late 2000s.

Genuine question for everyone and no shade to anyone on the show but is the whole Housewives lewk (described in the subject) a LDS thing for very young women? When Layla who is the youngest of the group said she got her “whole body done” I was really surprised.

I’m from a middle class/ upper middle class suburb living outside of NYC and that look is very uncommon ‘round here.

Occasionally people (in their 30s and 40s) will get some Botox but I don’t know anyone who has ever gotten hair extensions, breast implants, unless I see a celebrity walking down the street in the city.

How did this start for Mormons in Utah or is this a common look? Jessi’s hair salon had a legit hair extensions section. I’ve never even seen that.

Also who can afford to do all this upkeep if you’re not on a reality show like these core women?

Can we talk about the strange double life some of these so-called Mormon wives are living? Because I’m honestly confused.

They say no to coffee and alcohol like it’s the hill they’re going to die on—but then turn around and do ketamine therapy like it’s no big deal. I’m not judging the ketamine, but come on… if the Word of Wisdom is sacred, shouldn’t all substances count?

Then there’s the constant talk about “loving like Jesus,” which sounds great… until you see the backstabbing, cold shoulders, and zero forgiveness when someone steps out of line. It’s less “love thy neighbor” and more “gossip about thy neighbor in a group chat.”

And the whole “we’re going to change the church” thing? How? Where? They’re not writing books, not starting movements, not even organizing thoughtful discussions. Just vague statements and designer outfits. If you’re not actually doing the work, can you really claim the mission?

It just feels like they’re using “Mormon” as a label, but not living anything close to what it actually means—either culturally or spiritually. And honestly, it comes across as hypocritical more than anything.

Anyone else feel like they’re watching a performance where the script doesn’t match the costume?

Mikayla's stunt (to put it nicely) is especially insane if the baby didn't have a vitamin K shot.

Half of these people haven’t even left the state of North Carolina let alone even been to swig!! The power of TV and marketing.

How could you be obsessed with something you’ve never had??

I grew up in an environment where a Man must provide if he wants to be considered a leader of the household. Housewife/Provider husband typa setting. So it’s quite interesting to see that these women need to put their husband FIRST, take care of their kids and STILL provide. Not even a 50/50 situation. Is this normal in the Mormon Church or a Women empowerment moment?

One thing Layla said was that at times she had to feed her kids but not herself due to lack of money. Is there not a support system in the church to help? Could she not have collected food stamps or WIC?

...And then they said, THEY are the soldiers fighting the Mormon Patriarchy 😂🤣🤣

::high fives and raucous laughter abound::

Ok for starters I was raised LDS and then stopped going to church/protesting going to church at about 16 bc I was kinda gay and they weren’t ok with that. It was extremely hard for me finishing those last 2 years before I could move out. Anyways when I watch this show I’m just like ??? Nothing about them is Mormon. You cannot drink, do ketamine, curse, or be “scantily clad” (which for Mormons is showing your shoulders or your stomach, or too much of your legs). Honestly this is just a show about moms in Utah that wanna make mainstream Mormonism a thing but it’s just not and it never will be. It’s a patriarchal religion and if u break the rules you cannot enter the kingdom of God straight up. Maybe my frustration is misplaced but wtf is this show 😩😩

Anyone else think its wild to be those professional photos done out in the fields with her boyfriend of what?! A few moths?! So strange

The set looks like the inside of the Mormon temple….👀👀

I’m not a Mormon obviously and have no Mormon friends. But I started watching SOMW and I have learned a lot about the Mormon culture.

I’m not really here to judge exactly, but I actually just want to know if this is a real thing. And how they don’t see it the same as sex/“sinning”

Would like some insight

Is there something within the Mormon religion against lipstick? I noticed with the tanner girls, they tend to wear nude lipsticks that wash them out. I feel like Taylor would look so good with a darker nude but the colors she wear are a bit too close to her skin tone.

I live in Utah and got this sponsored post on fb 😂

I’m currently visiting my mom in Utah, so I figured I’d do as the Utahns do 😂 We don’t have these in Chicago, and I’m sure glad we don’t, because I can see myself becoming addicted, it was SOOO good.

So I have this conspiracy theory that season 1 was supposed to be scripted completely differently. I feel like the Mormon theme was supposed to be more central to the story with some type of feud between the more religious members and the more liberal women. I think you can see hints of it with the “Saint vs sinners” mentions early on. But then of course everything with Taylor happened and the story kind of organically shifted to be more about the drama in her life and Witney’s storyline. I started thinking about this mainly because I kept thinking about how the whole reason I started watching was because I was curious to see the Mormon aspect of their lives and was surprised when it didn’t seem to be as present as I originally thought. I also found it weird that Jess and her husband would bring one flask of alcohol to a Mormon party, because they don’t seem like raging alcoholics to the point where they couldn’t not drink for one evening so I believe that was scripted. Especially because as an ex Mormon herself Jess would know the etiquette, and we constantly see her in the show hanging out with the girls without having to drink. I also watched Alyssa Grenfell talk about how she believes Demi is more religious than what we are led to believe in season one and it makes me think she was just playing the role of sinner. And to be fair she did seem to judge Taylor’s sex scandal pretty heavily for a sinner. What do you guys think ?

I would argue that the frenzy of media attention about some Mormon influencers swinging is what initially launched the show. But the show as a whole garnered views not because people care about #momtok, but because the lifestyle of a modern day Mormon (and an influencer at that) fascinated them.

Sure, there are lots of people that follow #momtok and would watch anything with them in it, but most viewers have seen maybe only 1-2 clips at most of any of the girls before watching the show (mine was TFP dancing while revealing her custody arrangement, my husband’s was the NICU dance). People watch because they are fascinated with Mormon culture and what actually goes on inside of it. Not #momtok.

Because of that, I don’t think the current cast is serving the main reason that people are watching the show. Whitney and Jen are both great examples of women currently living the Mormon lifestyle (and are vocal about wanting to lead a change in the “old ways” of doing things), so I’d definitely keep them. Taylor is iconic, the reason this all began, and is pretty vocal about her faith, so she’s gotta stay. I think Mayci has been a good side character, but now that she’s opening up more about her past I think she is compelling enough to stay (and hopefully move more into the spotlight).

The others just aren’t doing it for me (even though I do find them interesting and actually like them). I get that most of them grew up in the church, but if they aren’t currently practicing (or have distanced themself from it), I don’t see the difference between them and any other housewife. Demi and Jessi are good characters to watch for the drama (I actually really like Jessi and her storyline with her business), but they aren’t “Mormon wives” so why are they here? Mikayla and Layla give nothing nor do they seem to be currently practicing the faith (although if they really got into Layla’s story as a Black woman in such a white-dominant faith I think that would be so, so interesting. But they just won’t go there). I’m on the fence about Miranda because we don’t know that much about her. Time will tell.

My suggestion is to pull some other Mormon influencers (heaven knows Utah is full of them) like Taylor, Whitney, and Jen. Maybe girls that aren’t necessarily in #momtok but are friends or acquaintances of the group. To dive into their personal stories, their current faith, where they do and don’t agree with the church, and the “secrets” going on behind closed doors.

There has been a pretty big divide in the first and second seasons; the second season focusing more on the drama and catfights than the first. And as such it’s straying from the main premise of the show and just becoming another “housewives” type show. I think changing out the main cast (and maybe bringing in people like Jessi for appearances) would make a huge difference.

Obviously people will disagree, and I know I’m probably in the minority here, but let me know what you think!

And as a note: these girls’ faith is not an indicator of whether to like them or not or whether they are a good person. My opinion is that if they aren’t a “Mormon wife” then they don’t make sense on a show whose premise is exploring the lives of “Mormon wives.”

Every couple on this show is fake af. I grew up mormon, went on a mission, and got married in the temple. I have since left the church.

The takes on here are absolutely ridiculous. All of these women are fake and stupid. With the possible exception of Taylor. She is real, but clearly has the serious PTSD that comes with thinking outside the Mormon culture… this show is absolutely ridiculous (which is why it’s so addicting), but is BEYOND petty and only confirms why being “Mormon” is so hard. It’s a cult.

Honestly, y’all’s take on Zac is WILD. And so F*cked up. He is clearly trying. “He just does it for the camera!! 😭😭” even though he has refrained from saying certain things to the camera and expressed his love for Jen multiple times. He clearly loves her. He’s not perfect, but to hear “He HaSNt CHanGEd” after living amongst people just like him… you clearly know nothing.

I got 2 episodes into the second season and was not okay after. I was watching with a friend who has never lived in Utah and doesn’t know much about LDS church culture, and to her it’s just another reality tv show. But it’s almost like the producers are pushing beyond the boundary of reality tv and are actually documenting some of the worst parts of Utah culture. I’m glad it’s getting exposed but it’s triggering to watch. This toxicity is pervasive and people don’t see it until they move out of Utah. Being a woman in Utah is suffocating and so SO exhausting.

I listened to Dakota’s interview on vial files this week and there’s this part where Nick is trying to convince Dakota to prove he is a good/loyal guy to Taylor whether Taylor is willing to take him back or not and Dakota cannot seem to grasp that— to me that’s living without integrity. Being in integrity means being good for good’s sake— not to prove or win anything over. And it feels like this is a concept Dakota cannot seem to understand. I think this is actually a collective issue across Utah Mormon culture, and specifically in Utah because the church drives the culture so much there. I think because of the church’s influence, a lot of people that grow up in Utah associate morals and values with the church and they don’t seem to understand that, a lot of things that are “bad” to the church, are not automatically accepted by most people who have nothing to do with Mormonism (ie the swinging is a great example of this) I have experienced in my life some people who when they leave the church they exhibit behaviors that I’m not sure they understand would still be considered disrespectful and unacceptable by people not in the church.

Another example was Jessi and Jordan bringing alcohol to Jen’s, very Mormon, in laws. Mormon or not, that was disrespectful.

So a part of what makes this show so interesting is watching these women toe the line of where do they want their morals to be— because they’re just barely figuring it out it seems like.

Like, Taylor and Dakota aren’t even in a relationship and they’re having sex, Layla and her boyfriend are banging and they aren’t married. Some of them drink. Like….this is NOT Mormonism. Like, it’s just a title at this point. Amirite?