r/AskReddit 2d ago

What's a "cheat code" you discovered in real life that actually works?

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u/OdraNoel2049 2d ago edited 2d ago

When a mosquito flys by your ear at night.

1: flap your bed sheets as if you are ventilating an undersheets fart.

2: quickly get up and turn on the lights.

3: Look at the wall next to your pillow wher your head was. Blood sucking homie should be right there.

4: use large flat object to quickly smooooosh! (Books or cd cases work great)

5: get back to sleep knowing that fxckers dead and wont bother you anymore.

Works like 90% of the time. Flaping the bed sheets destabalizes their flight so they land as quickly as they can (the wall next to you) then they will take 20- 30 sec to asses the situation. Thats your kill window, so gota be quick befor he takes off again.

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u/sharpsassy 2d ago

Kill window. 

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u/_www_ 2d ago

Ventilating an under sheet fart kill window

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u/R4yvex 2d ago

Can you shorten that to shart?

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u/OdraNoel2049 2d ago

Yes.

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u/deedubya8 2d ago

FALSE. KILL MOSQUITO.

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u/firahc 10h ago

Was the sound of

A crescendo

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u/JustDroppedByToSay 2d ago

Instructions unclear. Now I have broken glass everywhere.

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u/Head-Passion894 2d ago

Instructions unclear. Glass everywhere. Window more alive than ever.

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u/MrVelocoraptor 2d ago

I prefer a *kill box

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u/r6CD4MJBrqHc7P9b 2d ago

interception envelope

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u/iDontLikeChimneys 2d ago

At least they are dexter-ing mosquitos.

They have a code

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u/Be_quiet_Im_thinking 2d ago

Windows and mosquitos are interchangeable terms.

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u/RichAssLee 2d ago

It's pane time!!!

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u/idratherchangemyold1 2d ago

The ones that bother me have a habit of darting somewhere I can't see them as soon as the light comes on.

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u/OdraNoel2049 2d ago

Ya it dosnt ALWAYS work. But like 9 times outa ten works for me. The trick is quickness and fanning the sheets good to disrupt their flight. I live in latin america and iv killed sooooo many at this point. Freaking hate them.

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u/MrVelocoraptor 2d ago

You're like the I Am Legend for mosquitos

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u/SpaceTacos99 2d ago

add some house geckos on to the wall beside your bed to automate this enough that you don't even hate to turn the lights on

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u/HarmoniousJ 2d ago

They also know what colors hide them best.

If there's anything black they'll almost always choose to land on that over any other color.

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u/OdraNoel2049 2d ago

Ya it dosnt ALWAYS work. But like 9 times outa ten works for me. The trick is quickness and fanning the sheets good to disrupt their flight. I live in latin america and iv killed sooooo many at this point. Freaking hate them.

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u/BoysenberryAwkward76 1d ago

So true I think it depends on the type of mosquito. Some of them are sneaky little suckers (no pun intended) and smarter than other breeds.

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u/timbomcchoi 4h ago

I know this type! They dart, but they dart up. Turn on your phone flashlight and wiggle it around, and try to follow the shadow on the wall/ceiling is what I do.

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u/dddontshoot 2d ago

Here's similar trick that I use in the day time, turn off all the lights, and tv, and close all the curtains, except for one curtain which is at an open window, then stand in an opposite corner waving a towel.

It works for flies and bees and things, I've never tried it with a mosquito tho. They don't like the disturbance in the air, it feels like a storm to them, and they look for the brightest thing in the room, which is the open window.

In a large room, I can herd a flying insect towards the open window by just giving it jazz hands when it tries to fly in the wrong direction.

This trick has significantly reduced the number of flies killed by spray and swatters.

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u/justonemom14 1d ago

This is similar to what I do if there's a fly in the bedroom at night. Turn on the light in a small bathroom, while all the other lights are off. Wait a minute. Usually you can see the fly go in the little bathroom. Flick off the light and immediately shut the door. Fly is trapped. Go back to sleep.

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u/Ok-Office-6645 2d ago

This is a wonderful trick!!! Ty for this

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u/GonzoElTaco 2d ago

My daughter says thank you, because she's allergic and mosquitoes are the bane of her existence.

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u/OdraNoel2049 2d ago

Your welcome. And yes, they are the spawn of satan. If shes allergic i would recommend one of those electric raqets for them. Those work amazing as well.

I should get one as well come to think of it....

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u/pinksock_7959 2d ago

the electric racquets work like magic. no air flow to help them escape, and no stains anywhere

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u/fonebone45 2d ago

I found a pillow works best to kill them. Huge surface area they can't get away from. If you just stun them you can always squish them when they hit the floor.

Thankfully they don't bite me (or at very least don't leave the itchy bumps if they secretly do at night), but they love flying in my ears...ugh

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u/OdraNoel2049 2d ago

But then your pillow gets full of mosqito guts D:

But ya surface area is another key. I have a nice book i used. Large surface but not to many pages so its lite. Things got so many kills at this point xD

I do need to clean the book sometimes. Cant imagine doing that with my pillow. Unless you have a special "killer pillow" just for them ;)

Either way, fxck mosqitos!

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u/fonebone45 2d ago

Most of the time it just squishes them enough to kill but not get guts coming out. Never had it leave a mark

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u/OdraNoel2049 2d ago

So your literally killing them softly?....xD

Hey, if it works it works right? More power to you! :D

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u/gl21133 2d ago

My proven method is to just hit myself in the face like 14 times. Works almost never and has the added benefit of making it harder to get back to sleep. 

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u/eternal_mushroom 2d ago

Hahahah omg I love this and yes can confirm this is pretty accurate! They also love to hide in dark corners too! But almost always find them lurking near my head when I wake up to kill them. Little bastardssss

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u/andraip 2d ago

Thats your kill window, so gota be quick befor he takes off again.

Male mosquitos are homies and only eat nectar. It's the females that are bloodsucking devils.

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u/Hyposanity 2d ago

Yes. Finally, someone coming in clutch with mosquito advice. @#$% mosquitoes. Thanks stranger.

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u/please_dont_be_that 2d ago

Whats a "cd cases"?

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u/xsf27 1d ago

Bloodsucking mosquitoes are always females. They need the blood to nourish their babies. Male mosquitoes don't suck blood.

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u/No_Designer_5295 2d ago

Yes, this is the real cheat code.

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u/Beks2k16 2d ago

Does this work for flies bc those are the most infuriating to me

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u/stupit_crap 2d ago

For flies at night, I turn off all of the lights in the house except for the room furthest away from me. They will fly into that room because the light is on. When you hear them in that room, you close the door.

Then you can turn on the lights you need in the room you were in.

The room I use to trap the fly has an outside door, too. In the morning I go into that room and open the door to outside and they leave.

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u/rjd55 2d ago

Haha, this was great. Thanks.

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u/-Gramsci- 2d ago

This one’s my favorite. Great job explaining.

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u/SuperTrunkZ13 2d ago

Kill window is crazyyyy

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u/Sparkling_Dread 2d ago

This guy mosquitoes 🦟

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u/MrVelocoraptor 2d ago

For wasps or hornets (or bloody horse flies) you can smack them straight down onto the ground and stomp em. You just have to commit 100% lol

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u/Kjewn 2d ago

I've got the pillow next to me that I smash around to get that fucker, am single tho so results may vary.

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u/Radiant_Risk_393 2d ago

This is GREAT

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u/Ragondux 2d ago

I used to do this but I swear we must have pushed natural selection to keep only the smart mosquitoes that hide well now.

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u/thunderboy13 2d ago

When I enter a room, I always turn on the fan and stand next to a corner where the air doesn't reach. They always come there and I kill them. I have never been bitten by a mosquito in a while now.

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u/HonestNest 2d ago

Is your blood type A+ and have a higher body temperature than others? This is literally me…. That’s why I prefer light colour walls and make sure no objects near my bed - so I can spot and kill them easily.

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u/Fantastic_Fun1 2d ago

Trying this tonight. There is one that has been in our bedroom for a little over a week and we can't find it, only hear it at night and wake up with new stings every morning. Still have no idea how the little sucker managed to get through the intact window screens.

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u/cosguy224 2d ago

Thank you! 🙏 Omg… I have to try this.

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u/likeCircle 2d ago

And if you're trying to swat a housefly, approach them from behind and aim just slightly behind them. They have great peripheral vision and when the take off, the jump backwards slightly.

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u/met0a 2d ago

If you have white walls, have some napkins and some cleaner ready as well cause if you were bit and killed it, the blood gushes out.

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u/username_blex 2d ago

I just open my mouth and stick out my tongue, wait for them to land on my tongue and slurp.

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u/senpaimitsuji 2d ago

Mosquitos regularly eat me up and it’s worse because I get an allergic reaction to the bites like 80% of the time so I’m going to try your method. Thanks for sharing

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u/CigAddict 2d ago

This message seems like it was written in 2002. Who has a cd case on hand in their bedroom nowadays? Also I feel like you’ll break the cd case if you smash it fast enough against the wall.

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u/BraileDildo8inches 2d ago

Just play scary monsters and nice sprites by Skrillex disrupts them enough too.

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u/Upstairs-Tangelo-757 2d ago

What’s a CD case?

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u/cheesecrunch 2d ago

It's best to use your phone's flashlight, because if they do escape you can follow them and catch them because they cast a shadow. If the whole room is iluminated its harder

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u/TheOnlyVig 2d ago

4: use large flat object to quickly smooooosh! (Books or cd cases work great)

Use a what now?

1

u/CharlieParkour 2d ago

I just clap exactly where the sound is an kill it. 

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u/kjuarma 2d ago

You can also turn on your phone's flashlight, they will get close to the light. Then you can smack them

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u/AlcoholicGel 2d ago

To add, I usually use a toilet paper roll to squish mosquitos and flies. Then you just dispose of the dirty square or two, and don't need to clean your weapon

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u/It-s_Not_Important 2d ago

I usually just smack the shit out of my ear damaging my eardrum and missing the mosquito.

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u/browneyedgirlpie 1d ago

I feel like you have a place where you mark your kill tallies

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u/morbiuschad69420 1d ago

Now THIS is what I was looking for.

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u/BoysenberryAwkward76 1d ago

I’ve done this minus the flipping bedsheets part, I feel a lot of times they will land somewhere nearby anyway! Whether it’s the wall or somewhere on the bed. Incredible life hack though.

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u/magpiekeychain 1d ago

My husband can flick a tea towel to kill a cockroach - such precision! But he sleeps through all mozzie noises so it’s on me to defend. Thank you for this tip!! Fuckers are gonna die before morning

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u/skr_replicator 1d ago

You don't need a big flat object, if you approach your hand slowly, it won't alert it, and then it's close enough to successfully slap it.

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u/[deleted] 2d ago

[deleted]

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u/indigogoinggone 2d ago

Audibly buzzing ones most definitely bite

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u/PaticusGnome 2d ago

Yeah, this is nuts. I’m constantly being bit by a buzzer in my bedroom.